Myths About Sexual Assault

Link to Rape Crisis, “Common Misconceptions About Rape”

The following post is from the Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault Coalition:

“When a girl says ‘no’, she really means ‘yes’.
A lot of guys think a girl just says no because she’s supposed to – and that she can’t say that she wants sex even when she does. And that “no” is just the beginning of negotiating for a “yes”. But a guy doesn’t have the right to make up a girl’s mind for her, or to pressure her to agree.

Girls who get drunk at parties or on dates deserve whatever happens to them.
Getting drunk is not a good idea if you want to keep yourself safe, but it does not make it okay for a guy to take advantage of the situation. As a matter of fact, since rape is defined as sex without consent, having sex with someone who is drunk IS RAPE. By law, if a person is intoxicated or drugged, they do not have the ability to give consent.

If a girl wears sexy clothes on a date, it means she wants to have sex.
Girls often dress to look attractive for a date, but that doesn’t mean that they want to have sex with them (or anyone else, for that matter). It is impossible to determine what a girl wants to do – sex or any other activity – based on what clothes she is wearing.

Rape is sometimes the victim’s fault – in some circumstances.
It is NEVER, under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, the victim’s fault. Without consent, freely given, a sexual act is rape, and it is against the law.

If a woman goes somewhere alone with a man that means she wants to have sex with him.
Sometimes it’s nice for a girl to be alone with her date. It’s easier to talk, and find out what the guy’s really like. They might want to see how they get along together without their friends around. This may even mean going in to a bedroom. But that doesn’t mean the girl wants to have sex – it only means that she wants to be alone with him.

If a guy spends a lot of money on a date, the girl “owes” him something in return.
People date because they like each other. They want to spend time together. Dating isn’t like a business deal. And sex is not something you pay for. A guy and a girl may have sex after a date. But it should be something they both want to enjoy with each other. (Sex with any individual under 18 years old is considered “statutory rape”, whether consent is given or not, and is against the law.)

The majority of reported rape incidents are false accusations. What’s to stop a girl changing her mind and saying it’s rape the next day?
It is very difficult for a victim of rape to come forward and report it, so it is extremely unlikely that reports of rape are false. As a matter of fact, FBI statistics say that false reporting of rape is like any other crime, approximately 2-4% of cases.

If a girl is flirting with a guy, that means she wants to “go all the way.”
Everybody likes to flirt. Half the fun of a date is flirting. And the reason you date is to see if you two like each other. But deciding whether you’ll have sex or not requires consent by both people. Consent is defined by the law as an agreement made without pressure, manipulation or intimidation. Otherwise, it’s rape.” -DVSAC, “For Women” (link above to the original post)


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